I tested asyncore_fix_refused-3.patch on Mac OS X 10.5 - all asyncore 
and asynchat tests pass.

There is one minor issue - _exception calls the non existing 
handle_close_event instead of handle_close.

However, looking again at the code I think that it is ugly and wrong - 
handle_expt_event should handle the low level expt event called from 
select, allowing third party dispatcher to override the behavior as 
needed.

Another issue - lately, a new event was added - handle_connect_event - 
this is wrong! there is no such low level event. handle_connect is a 
high level event, implied by first read or write on the connecting 
socket. This event will break 3rd party dispatcher that does not 
implement it, and is not documented.